It Came Just the Same

Christmas looks a little different this year. It’s the first without my mom. I’m going through the motions, but if we’re being honest, I haven’t really found that Christmas spirit this year.

So much of the magic of Christmastime for me is wrapped up in my mom. I don’t know how she ever found the time, energy, or money to get it all done, but she made Christmas perfect. I miss her more than anything. I’m still angry that she left us so soon. I feel cheated out of so many years I thought we had left. I used to tell her all the time that she couldn’t leave me because I wasn’t done with her yet. But Mom believed in divine intervention, and she always told me that it wasn’t her choice to make. She said she’d do her best to stick around. I know she tried.

This is also the first Christmas with my first granddaughter. She had been the absolute greatest gift. My Tiny Bestie 💕 has brought so much joy to my heart. Her smile, her giggle, her snuggling into my chest and falling asleep is everything. I understand why Mom loved being Granny more than anything. I wish she could’ve been here to experience being a great Granny, but then again, she always was a GREAT Granny. She was THE BEST. I know my granddaughter has the most amazing angel watching over her.

When I’d stress over something at Christmas, Mom would always quote Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas. She’d smile and say, “ It came without ribbons. It came without tags. It came without packages, boxes, or bags.” It was her way of telling me that everything would be ok. Mom was so wise.

This year has been such a roller coaster ride, and if you remember, I hate roller coasters. But Christmas is magic. It came just the same. I’m blessed to be surrounded by family and friends who love me, and remind me that everything is going to be ok. Mom said I needed to go on living, and I’m trying my best.

I wish you all a very Merry Christmas!

❤️💚🎄